I haven’t posted in a while because I’m still trying to assess my feelings with leaving in three days and, truthfully, even if I were to post a blog for every day I missed, it would all be the same thing.
The overwhelming feeling right now is anxious, nervous, and a bit scared, which is normal for me. I love new places, but actually traveling, as in the actual transportation, the moving of persons, is always daunting for me, even though I’m quite seasoned, having traveled between coasts for four years.
I’m even a bit afraid navigating the cities I’m visiting and their respective metros, which is entirely strange, and quite stupid to feel, given that I’ve lived in one of the most bustling in the world. But I think it comes from the fact that everything is about to be, literally, foreign in three days. Living in New York, I had family friends, friends from high school, and it was still in the United States. I don’t know anyone in London, Paris, Prague, Berlin, or Brussels. And that scares the hell out of me.
I find myself thinking about getting pick-pocketed or someone stealing my passport or losing it, and just generally worrisome stuff that is quite trivial when I actually articulate it.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m beyond excited and grateful for this trip I get to go on. I know that once I’m actually on the plane or actually in whatever city I’m visiting, I’ll feel completely comfortable. I know that; it’s just normal for me to feel this general anxiety about traveling.
So I’ll return to you, blog, in the airport at 7 in the morning. Until then, I’m going to deal with these minor anxious thoughts and figure out what I’m going to do in each city or just trying to keep my mind off it, as I’m prepared as I can be.